Hippie wisdom, with a side of economics
Hello, November! Where did this year go? I am normally a major hater when it comes to wintertime, but a certain someone changed that for me last year, and I am really looking forward to cold and snowy mornings at home, bundled up days out in the city, and walks and dates in frosty evenings. Hooray for winter.So many changes this winter, too. With the advent of a new job, I feel it is a time to do some mental housecleaning. I have spent many months wallowing in the dejection spawned by an unsatisfying situation at work. I am so ready for that to stop. This weekend I spent a lot of time thinking about how exhausting it is to think. I am so tired of being inside my own head, constantly worrying, planning, evaluating, analyzing, fearing, scheming, worrying. Now is the time for a new mental exercise: letting go. All the critical, analytical, compulsive thoughts swirling in my brain, well, they don't help me get anywhere as a sentient, intelligent human being.
I would like to get the word "relax" tattooed on my hand in curvy script. I need a reminder that the universe provides for me, every single day, in so many ways that I take for granted. On a basic level, I have been provided with good health, good family, a good mind, and a purpose. I have a job, food, a roof over my head, clothing, reliable transport, and all the other little things that facilitate a relatively easy life.
Last month I was very poor, for whatever reason...I honestly have no idea where my tiny paycheck goes every month. But that's beside the point. Despite a near-total lack of funds, I managed to make it through the month with enough food and probably more entertainment than most people in the world. It's important to remember that.
Furthermore, Anthony has been teaching me a lot about what he calls "human capital." From what I understand, human capital is who you are and what you would be able to offer the world even if you found yourself suddenly broke, jobless, homeless, and friendless. We all have human capital--it's our intelligence, initiative, willingness to work, our capability to ask for help and offer it to others, our determination, our compassion, our spark.
Perhaps we all should consider inventorying our human capital. It goes along with the chronic need to relax. Once we are aware of our human capital, no circumstance could possibly destroy us.
In any event, I am dedicating myself to the practice of relaxing, of letting things go, of allowing myself be 24 and fully enjoy it, letting myself make mistakes without mentally berating myself. I want to start believing the best of everyone and stop looking for the shadows created by every ray of sunshine. It's time to let go of insecurity and inner critics, and begin chasing down all the fun and happiness in life.
Starting right now.
Well, as soon as I get off work.
posted by Juliet @ 9:50 AM
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